worst weekend ever

so this has been one of the worst weekends on record. I hate conflict. I also hate the flu. I had both this weekend. I was attacked by a strange virus that included both the stomach flu, a cold, a sore throat, a fever and the usual aches that come with the flu. It has been two days of calling ralph on the big white telephone (which is the handy euphemism my dad used when one of us kids would throw up) When I get sick I also get insomnia. So Jeremy has sat up these last few nights with me, feeling my head and telling me I feel like I am on fire. Well my head may be on fire but the rest of me feels like it has been dipped in ice water.
frickity frick. I hate this weekend. (apparently the sailor steering this boat had the worst weekend ever also, or that is at least what Google images liked to title this picture.)

an answer

In response to my last post an author has asked me why her comments made me so upset. The answer is plain and simple. I am sure anyone would get upset and hurt if they felt publicly shamed and judged. If you call someone names in public it is obviously going to hurt and that person will probably defend themselves. There is no deeper issue here other than to say thank you for your apology, I hope you will remember to be more careful with your words and judgments in the future. If any of my words have been misunderstood and hurtful I also apologize.

convenient interpretation

Most Christians claim to be "Biblical Christians" They claim to follow the bible as God's word and as an authority for how they live their lives. They think that they follow the bible as how it is meant to be followed. They think they are coming to their own conclusions when they read the bible. I would argue that we are all guilty of convenient interpretation. We see the bible and read it with one narrow interpretation or how it most conveniently fits into our lives. We do not see how there is 2000 years of history, thought, theology and philosophy that informs our reading of scripture. Most do not know how many diverse interpretations of theological issues exist or for the hundereds of years they have been argued over. Or, as most people do, we take it for what we want to take it for. A perfect example of this is the issue of women. We do not presume to interpret the passages that say that women should not wear braided hair, gold jewelry and other such adornments literally, we say " oh that was for that time and place, it is cultural." But in the same breath these supposed "Biblical Christians" say that women should not lead or teach, that they must take a submissive role in the church and in the home. This is an easy example of this convenient interpretation that pervades the so called 'biblical church' If we say we want to live literally by some of the passages then we must according to logic live literally by the rest of the things Paul mentions.
But let us be honest with ourselves and with everyone around us. We are all guilty of picking things out of the bible that we like and ignoring the things we don't like.
I think it takes courage and a heart that truly is seeking truth to face these contradictions and think about them and not just accept the same old same old answers.
This is one of the smallest, but most obvious reasons why I don't believe in the submission of women. This is by no means a proper theological or academic discussion on the topic. (but we could have one if anyone wants) That is because this is my blog. This is not an academic paper that I am writing. This is where I post my opinions. Please readers do not take these things personally. I am not asking anyone to believe what I believe only that they truly examine the evidence and use critical thinking skills in life instead of ignorance. That is all I am advocating. Critical thinking.

judgement

I was recently attacked for my interpretation on the role of women in this day and age.
I think that the person who attacked me read a little portion of what i was thinking and called me immature and told me that sorrows would come in my life to shape me.
I would like to say that I have studied theology academically now for three and a half years and any conclusions that I have come to are not flippant ones that I think of on my own they are rooted many hours of thought, discussion, history, philosophy and the wisdom of people who have lived far greater lives than me and also thought about these things. They are also not just swallowing what the church says you have to believe or what is right to believe to be a christian. They are also arrived at through experience. I have walked through darkness and beauty, I have battled with depression and finding my way out of it. God has walked with me through sorrow and darkness to healing and joy. He has walked with me through the destruction of my family and to the restoration of it, he has walked with me through the death of my spirit and the resurrection of it. I have see a lot. I have felt a lot and I have walked through even more. I have struggled to live with integrity and brutal honesty over what i think, believe and ultimately do.
This person implored me to think.
I would expect from the same to this person.
and I would also say that your judgments are incredibly hurtful. You did not just disagree you judged me, labeled me and called me down.
I would love to live world where not all people believe the same things, we may disagree we also may fervently argue our point of view but we do not judge. We say to each other, you may not be live the way I do, you may not worship God the way I do but I will respect that and love you anyway and build you up not tear you down.
I think that the person who said these things to me is a brave, strong and beautiful woman. She has inspired me in the way that she lives her life. I am sad that she resorted to judgement and to hurtful words and setting herself up as some sort of quasi authority for my marriage.

spring

I woke up this morning thinking it was spring. my heart skipped a beat until I looked out the window. crap. I have never been this partial towards spring but for some reason I am so so sick of winter this year. I could almost taste the flowers this morning. Well it is not as if i eat flowers. but this morning i think i would have. A big bite of garden.
it is still winter.

prior revleation

I have heard it said that any new revelation of God and his works must follow prior revelation. That is to say if what we think God is saying does not line up with the biblical revelation of who he is and how he works then it is not true. The the bible is the so called plumb line to determine all acts that are truly of God or not. I was thinking about this and thought that if the Nation of Israel suddenly announced a mandate to exterminate the entire Palestinian Nation every man, woman, child and baby that this would be in line with past biblical revelation about God. In the old testament God did indeed order the extermination of the Amalekites every man, woman, child and baby.
what does this say about the biblical revelation of God?

women

We are told that to be good christian women we must submit to our husbands. That man is the head of the household and that women are to submit to the supposed authority given to them by God and anointed by the christian church.
I think that women accept this pattern of living not just because the church tells them they must in order to be good and to avoid sinning, but I think more importantly women use this as a convenient excuse to escape the moral ambiguity of life. Life is confusing, painful and full of things that we cannot, no matter how hard we try, reconcile through the supposed christian worldview.
I do not think that women do this consciously but in the end it is accomplished through the sheer force of fear that they willingly give up their right to critical thinking and accept this second rate human existence.
The most beautiful women I know take participate in humanity. They walk through the moral ambiguity of life with eyes wide open, they are responsible for interpreting the world around them and acting on the convictions of their thoughts and hearts.
this is the kind of woman that I seek to be.